speachless...breathless....
Our Christmas was so good. It was nice this year to not have to go, go, go and visit, visit, visit. We had a simple time at home and my parents came over and we just relaxed. It was so good. Even though later that night we decided that we would rather eat out than stay in..lol...which really turned out to be a mistake. The only place open on Christmas Day was Grand Buffet and I thought to myself, "It couldn't be all that bad, right?" Well, it wasn't really, but I promise I won't go back there..lol. Do you ever get the feeling, when you eat out, that you just aren't sitting in the most clean environment? I rarely get that feeling...we don't eat out much...but, I did at the Grand Buffet. The food was ok and all, it just felt dirty. Maybe I'm just being overly critical...I can be that way, but I kept like looking over my shoulder every now and again and noticing the stains on the walls (obviously from the storms Rita and Ike) and wondering if they had mold....I noticed the carpet and the smell in the air...did they clean this table before they sat us here? Sometimes I get and eerie feeling in Chinese food places...maybe because of the buddah or the dragons they have everywhere....creepily looking at you as you eat.
Anyway, Christmas was a blast. Cade got his Castle Game and, in fact, told me that it was the only present that Santa brought him. Ryan and I haven't pushed Santa nor have we really talked about him at all. It's everyone else that asks him about what Santa would bring. I just want my children to grow up knowing that Christmas is about Jesus and not presents. Dan used to tell us a story about Ben growing up. He told us that once they were in Hardee's (remember this place?) and the waitress behind the counter asked Ben what Santa would bring and Ben (only 5 at the time) looked her square in the eyes and told her that Christmas was not about Santa...Christmas was about Jesus and Santa wasn't real. Dan said the lady's eyes were as big as saucers..lol. I want this to be my child. I want him to look at strangers and tell them the truth. I think that's really cool. Anyway, Cade told me that he loved his Castle Game and that he was sooo happy. "I so happy, Mommy...I luv you." That right there was worth what the game cost me. I honestly didn't think the game was worth the $22 I paid for it, but if my child is happy with that one thing, then it's worth it. Now, I'm not saying that's all he got, but Christmas was very modest this year at the Tucker house....the end.
On to more things...I have been studying about Esther in my "Women of the Bible" study. It's cool...you should check out the book of Esther and take a close look at the characters in the story. Her story is really neat because she became queen even though she was a Jew and shouldn't have even been considered. She kept secret who she really was until finally she had to stand up for her people who were about to be slaughtered because of pure hatred. Her uncle said this, "Do you think that it's by chance that you are in this position for such a time as this?" (obviously I paraphrased)...wow...Esther was placed in a position of power on purpose. She was just a regular girl...pretty, quiet, humble...but, God chose her to be the one to stand up and make a difference "for such a time as this". Then, now here is the killer...seriously, listen to this...it killed me....
"Confess any tendency to view your life in isolation from God's people, to shrink back from some step of faith God may be calling you to take."
Seriously, I read that and went, "whoa..." Speechless...breathless.
Most of you who read my blog know the struggles I have with my past family issues. If you don't have the foggiest idea about what this is then read my entry Ahem...so here goes posted on 10/6/08. I STILL have not made the call. I am so scared. I really can't say why, but I am terrified to do it. As I continued to read through the Bible I looked in the concordence under 'strength'. This is what God showed me:
"So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand. All who wage against you will surely be ashamed and disgraced; those who oppose you will be as nothing and perish. Though you search for your enemies, you will not find them. Those who wage war against you will be as nothing at all. For I am the Lord, your God, who takes hold of your right hand and says to you, Do not fear; I will help you." Isaiah 41:10-13
This was a complete support and help to me. Obviously, scripture is that, but this said exactly what I needed. I think my fears are that if I make the call the other end of the conversation will be harsh and unaccepting and just plain mean. Well, if that's the case God just told me that my enemies and those who oppose me will be as NOTHING. Hmmm...guess I need to pick up the phone, right? Please pray for me. Pray that I will do this soon. Time is running out for us here on this earth. Our time here is drawing to a close and I need to be the one to obey and make sure these people know Jesus before his return. This is a huge task for me and I want to be obedient. I'm at the jumping off point and all I need to do is step out on faith....and let Him catch me....
Anyway, Christmas was a blast. Cade got his Castle Game and, in fact, told me that it was the only present that Santa brought him. Ryan and I haven't pushed Santa nor have we really talked about him at all. It's everyone else that asks him about what Santa would bring. I just want my children to grow up knowing that Christmas is about Jesus and not presents. Dan used to tell us a story about Ben growing up. He told us that once they were in Hardee's (remember this place?) and the waitress behind the counter asked Ben what Santa would bring and Ben (only 5 at the time) looked her square in the eyes and told her that Christmas was not about Santa...Christmas was about Jesus and Santa wasn't real. Dan said the lady's eyes were as big as saucers..lol. I want this to be my child. I want him to look at strangers and tell them the truth. I think that's really cool. Anyway, Cade told me that he loved his Castle Game and that he was sooo happy. "I so happy, Mommy...I luv you." That right there was worth what the game cost me. I honestly didn't think the game was worth the $22 I paid for it, but if my child is happy with that one thing, then it's worth it. Now, I'm not saying that's all he got, but Christmas was very modest this year at the Tucker house....the end.
On to more things...I have been studying about Esther in my "Women of the Bible" study. It's cool...you should check out the book of Esther and take a close look at the characters in the story. Her story is really neat because she became queen even though she was a Jew and shouldn't have even been considered. She kept secret who she really was until finally she had to stand up for her people who were about to be slaughtered because of pure hatred. Her uncle said this, "Do you think that it's by chance that you are in this position for such a time as this?" (obviously I paraphrased)...wow...Esther was placed in a position of power on purpose. She was just a regular girl...pretty, quiet, humble...but, God chose her to be the one to stand up and make a difference "for such a time as this". Then, now here is the killer...seriously, listen to this...it killed me....
"Confess any tendency to view your life in isolation from God's people, to shrink back from some step of faith God may be calling you to take."
Seriously, I read that and went, "whoa..." Speechless...breathless.
Most of you who read my blog know the struggles I have with my past family issues. If you don't have the foggiest idea about what this is then read my entry Ahem...so here goes posted on 10/6/08. I STILL have not made the call. I am so scared. I really can't say why, but I am terrified to do it. As I continued to read through the Bible I looked in the concordence under 'strength'. This is what God showed me:
"So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand. All who wage against you will surely be ashamed and disgraced; those who oppose you will be as nothing and perish. Though you search for your enemies, you will not find them. Those who wage war against you will be as nothing at all. For I am the Lord, your God, who takes hold of your right hand and says to you, Do not fear; I will help you." Isaiah 41:10-13
This was a complete support and help to me. Obviously, scripture is that, but this said exactly what I needed. I think my fears are that if I make the call the other end of the conversation will be harsh and unaccepting and just plain mean. Well, if that's the case God just told me that my enemies and those who oppose me will be as NOTHING. Hmmm...guess I need to pick up the phone, right? Please pray for me. Pray that I will do this soon. Time is running out for us here on this earth. Our time here is drawing to a close and I need to be the one to obey and make sure these people know Jesus before his return. This is a huge task for me and I want to be obedient. I'm at the jumping off point and all I need to do is step out on faith....and let Him catch me....
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MY PLAN FOR 2009 WAS TO BE A HERMIT! DROP OUT OF CHURCH, AND STAY AT HOME BEHIND MY SAFE FOUR WALLS...ISOLATION..
NOT SAYING I HAVE CHANGED THE PLAN! I HAVE ENJOYED MY COUPLE OF WEEKS GOING NO WHERE. NO REJECTION. NO MEAN PEOPLE! I LIKE IT! NO WORRY...
BTW...KARA IS SO EXCITED ABOUT CADES PARTY! SHE SAID SHE IS BRINGING HER PILLOW AND GOING TO STAY THE NIGHT, SO GET READY FOR A FIT WHEN WE TRY TO LEAVE. HER AND MY DOG ARE MOVING IN WITH YOU, BUT THATS ANOTHER FUNNY STORY I'LL HAVE TO TELL YOU...