where He leads me....
It seems, sometimes, that I begin to feel invincible and take the attitude "no one can hurt me" or "no one notices me". Well, that's just not true. It hurts when you speak the truth and stand up for the truth and people knock your legs out from under you and kick you while you're down. Why is that? Hmmm...one of those many unaswerable questions. I guess I will never have life figured out. Sorry, I'm rambling and this probably makes absolutely no sense. I guess you could say that my feelings are hurt and leave it at that. Oh, well, I guess I will stand up, dust myself off, pull up my big-girl panties and keep on walking....whatever...
More on the topic of God changing my ministry. I spoke to Ryan about where I thought God was moving me. He is my sounding board for a lot of ideas that cross my mind and usually his answer is "go for it" or "follow through". I'm so blessed that God has given me someone who is first of all so in love with God and second is so wise. I sometimes can't believe how priveliged I am to have someone like him in my life. Anyway, I have been feeling for quite some time that I am being pulled away from youth ministry (I mentioned this in my previous post). Where exactly? Hmmm...that I don't know for sure but I think God's giving me bits and pieces of insight as to where He will use me next. Maybe women, maybe college, maybe children...maybe all of them...who knows. I just know that I want to be responsive and follow after my Lord. Where He leads me I will go!!
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I haven't had the courage, yet, to call the Browns. I know that God wants me to make contact and to just go for it, but I'm holding myself back. I think about how and what and when and what if and all those questionable things that MAY happen. But, instead of just going for it I back off from the actual issue and just say "later". I figured out that I'm just afraid. I'm truly afraid. I'm not trusting that God is big enough to handle this situation. How can that be? I just posted that I know God is moving in my life and moving my ministry in a different direction and that I'm following His leading there...but, how can I be so bold there and be so timid here? How can I truly say I will go where He leads me and not obey? Wow...I have some more growing to do. I need to be passed through the fire some more...deffinitely not done with my refining process. Keep praying for me.
Don't know where I would be without my girls...thanks for all your comments and prayers...love you all so much...xoxo
More on the topic of God changing my ministry. I spoke to Ryan about where I thought God was moving me. He is my sounding board for a lot of ideas that cross my mind and usually his answer is "go for it" or "follow through". I'm so blessed that God has given me someone who is first of all so in love with God and second is so wise. I sometimes can't believe how priveliged I am to have someone like him in my life. Anyway, I have been feeling for quite some time that I am being pulled away from youth ministry (I mentioned this in my previous post). Where exactly? Hmmm...that I don't know for sure but I think God's giving me bits and pieces of insight as to where He will use me next. Maybe women, maybe college, maybe children...maybe all of them...who knows. I just know that I want to be responsive and follow after my Lord. Where He leads me I will go!!
_____
I haven't had the courage, yet, to call the Browns. I know that God wants me to make contact and to just go for it, but I'm holding myself back. I think about how and what and when and what if and all those questionable things that MAY happen. But, instead of just going for it I back off from the actual issue and just say "later". I figured out that I'm just afraid. I'm truly afraid. I'm not trusting that God is big enough to handle this situation. How can that be? I just posted that I know God is moving in my life and moving my ministry in a different direction and that I'm following His leading there...but, how can I be so bold there and be so timid here? How can I truly say I will go where He leads me and not obey? Wow...I have some more growing to do. I need to be passed through the fire some more...deffinitely not done with my refining process. Keep praying for me.
Don't know where I would be without my girls...thanks for all your comments and prayers...love you all so much...xoxo
Comments
I am looking forward to see where God is moving you and wherever that is it will be great!
Stay strong and I know one day you will be able to make the contact with the Browns. Each day God is preparing you for whatever resolution that you need. You have been such an awesome freind in my busy life and I just want you to know that I truly care and think about you all the time.