Another Graduation....

 Well, it's not my graduation and neither of my boys graduated in 2025, but graduation always brings to me a felling of sentiment along with a little excitement and a tiny bit of sadness.  How is that possible, you ask? How do you feel all of that over a graduation that doesn't even involve your own children? Well, I have older children and I find myself reminiscing over their childhood days and how simple it all seemed then ...but I digress ... Graduation is supposed to be a celebration!  You finally made it through elementary, middle and high school and you finally gain your FREEDOM!  LOL well, if you ask many adults that have been graduated for years you might hear them say, "I still had to get through college, get married, have kids, find a job, work until I could finally retire, then retire ... the sentiment is real for me because I save every bit of history from my life and I enjoy remembering the days past and vividly enjoy the memories.  Sadness because those days are gone and they now live in the past.  It's weird, I know, but I don't care LOL my husband thinks it's odd that I save every scrap of paper that my boys have scribbled on, but I love all the memories of when they were young. Anyway....

I have been graduated for 29 years this year.  1996 was the year I gained MY "independence".  <<BTW, God has richly blessed me since then>>  I didn't see it all such a long time ago, but I am so grateful for the journey He allowed me to walk.  The friends I made, the places I've travelled, the experiences I've had, the husband I married, the children we brought into this world, the churches and people we've served, the souls I've been allowed to watch walk from death to life .. gosh how rich my life has been!!  I can't even begin to express how grateful I will always be for the life God has given me.

Back to graduation, though...my oldest son, the one who called me mom first, graduated high school last year.  Since he was very young, I have always felt some anxiety over what he would do for his profession, where he would go to college, how we would pay for college, how could we give him a vehicle to drive, how we would feed him <<if you don't know teenage boys eat A LOT and OFTEN>> ... there were many nights I would pray that God would provide scholarships, funding, donations, ANYTHING to help this kid get where he needed to go.  Last year I asked Cade the dreaded question a lot of high school seniors hear at least once before they walk that stage, "What do you want to do once you graduate?"  

His answer ... vague ... "I really don't know, I'll figure it out"

This scares a lot of parents.  Honestly, it didn't bother me.  One thing I know about my oldest son...he's going to "figure it out".  This has been his life's creed since he turned that corner to his teenage years.  If you know him, you know that boy loves the beach.  He loves the freedom to surf, be in the water, feel the wind, drive with the windows down.  He loves the salty air, the sun on his face and the sand on his skin.  If you met him you would think we've lived in Panama City all our lives and raised that boy on the water.  We didn't, but you would think we did.  His answer to "I'll figure it out" is who he is...literally.  He's what the cool kids call "really chill".  As his mother <<and, admittedly, a bit of a control freak>> I want him to have his next steps planned out before he takes them.  He doesn't. He never has.  His answer to "I'll just figure it out" has, in the past, given me a little concern, but lately I've admired how he doesn't let himself get tied down to a set list of things that he has to do before the end of the day or week.  He allows himself to breath and experience every day to the fullest.  He does have a job and he does work, but he takes time at end of the day to enjoy the sunsets and the surf.  I have been so proud as his mother to watch him grow and learn and walk with the Lord.  He has grown into such an incredible man and I pray every day about the woman that God has for him for the rest of his life.  I know He is preparing her to be his perfect match.  He will likely never ever read this, but I hope he knows how much I love him and admire who he is and how God has shaped his soul.  I have prayed since he was a few weeks old that God would prepare my heart to let him go one day.  That's a hard prayer and I prayed those words with trembling hands and tears in my eyes, but never any fear in my heart.  I know one day he will leave my house and he'll go ... go where?  Well, I don't know, but I do know that he will always follow where the Lord leads him.  I know that his heart is tender and, although he hides it sometimes, he does feel deeply and fully.  I know that he will succeed in whatever he does and I don't worry about him.  He is not afraid to travel and he is not afraid to go where he has never been...he always says he'll "figure it out".

So, does your kid sound like mine?  Has he/she recently graduated high school?  Have they spoken those words to you?  "I'll figure it out.".  If so, let me encourage you...he or she likely has thought long and hard about where God is pointing their life right now and that path may not be super clear to them so the only words they can respond with is "I'll figure it out".  Sometimes, they don't have every detail figured out yet, but they'll get there.  Let them enjoy being young.  You remember those days, right?  Free to feel every moment...the ability to just be present and feel young?  I remember those days...and I want both of my boys to have every opportunity to feel and experience their life and "figure it out".  I don't want to hinder any part of it.  I am learning to let go of them and let God guide their footsteps.  That's a hard place to live as a parent.  You raise these tiny humans, who need you every moment, to grow and need you less and less until they don't need you at all.  It's hard.  It just is.

GRADUATION....Congrats to all the graduating seniors!!  Don't ever forget to let yourself breathe once in a while.  You have earned every bit of this summer!  Enjoy every moment before your life starts to get busy.  Learn to reach for every moment ... and don't forget to let the Lord lead every step you take.